We've owned four new cars, two Daewoos and two Minis, all have been, to some extent or other, lemons or at least lemonish.
After taking back our first Daewoo Lanos for its initial service, the mechanics discovered that it had rust dots on its roof and I think something was wrong with the dash. So with barely a couple of thousand kms on the clock we had a roof respray and a new dash. All done under warranty. Things, more or less, continued in that vein until we traded it in on a newer Lanos - lime gold in colour this time around. It too had many problems and I was often thrilled to receive the dealerships loan car - an 80s Nissan Pintara - a car that was gutless when it was new and as the loan car was very, very tired, a slug up the freeway to work.
Next we bought our first Mini - a Cooper. It too had many problems and it too got to stay over night with the dealership and we received a loan car. However, the standard of loan car improved significantly. Over the years we've had a variety of Minis, Coopers, Cooper S models, cabriolets and most memorably a Mini Clubman decorated with zebra stripes (created as a promotional vehicle in conjunction with Monarto Zoo). We also got to drive several 3 Series cars, ranging from entry level slug luxo barge to the real deal. And we've got to drive a few 1 Series around too.
The Zebra impersonating Mini Clubman. A loan car.
Can't remember if it was an 'S' or just a Cooper but it was a cabrio! It was a loan car.
The first time I drove a BMW One Series. It too was a loan car.
How much was repaired under warranty on the first Mini, I don't know but after David got to drive a Mini Cooper S John Cooper Works on a special Mini day at a raceway, the suspect, lemony Cooper's days were numbered.
Enter stage left our latest vehicle, now over four years old. We drove many of the loan cars while in possession of the Works Mini. It has out lemoned every other car we have ever owned. It's had a number of steering pumps, drive belts, suspension parts, engine mounts, a wheel bearing and a host of other bits and bobs replaced. All under warranty (thank goodness).
So now we come to the climax of my little story and why I'm writing this blog entry. Our latest episode with the Mini cooper S John Cooper Works has surpassed all other lemoniness.
On Sunday we decide to drive Beau up to the new Crafers dog park, to show David who hadn't seen it yet and to give puppy a run. Just as we drove through the up-track Heysen tunnel we suddenly heard a strange sound. It seemed to be coming directly from below the gear stick. Then David backed off the throttle and instead of the car's 'snap,crackle and pop' emerging from the rear of the car it sounded too like it was coming from somewhere much further forward. There was no change in power and no warning lights came on.
We continued to doggy park and although the car was noisy, we could still get around.
By the time Tuesday came around the car was getting very noisy - whatever the problem was, it was getting worse.
A trip to the dealership confirmed ' Houston, we have a problem '.
And finally on Thursday the car got looked at properly and a course of action was prescribed.
The car had blown it's catalytic converter into smithereens - something very unusual indeed. So unusual that Mini Australia doesn't stock that part. In fact the part would have to come from Munich, Germany and it would take up to four weeks to ferry it to Australia. And it's not just a catalytic converter, it's an assembly that connects from the engine to the actual exhausts at the back of the car. It's not cheap either, over $3,500 was estimated!
So for the next number of weeks while our car resides at the dealership awaiting its new part we will be driving a loan car - currently a BMW 320 auto with leather and sat nav. Puppy will enjoy the extra space on the back seat.
Unfortunately our car is now out of warranty (it was so lemony that BMW Australia gave us an extra year warranty, extending it from three to four years). Perversely that has been our savior this time around, it lemoniness has meant that they will cover it under warranty. Thanks BMW! Huge sigh of relief!
So that is the state of play at the Chateau as it relates to transportation. So if you see a red Mini with stripes running around Adelaide in the next couple of weeks , rest assured. It's not us. We'll be the ones in a steely grey anonymous BMW 3 Series. Oh, we'll so fit in at Burnside Village!
