The art of dining

So, you have been invited to a dinner party at Chateau Glenunga.

Now, that sounds harmless enough. Perhaps even, enjoyable.

Think again!

A dinner party is an endurance event - much like a marathon. Just as a marathon can grind the unprepared into the ground, never to recover, so can the seemingy simple extravagance of a meal at the Chateau.

Preparation is vital. The chef and the host must be ready for anything - from spilled glasses of wine through to the sudden announcement from a guest that they are allergic to all foodstuffs that are green or any similar hue or colouration regardless of lighting conditions. With a bit of ingenuity even such potential horrors can be overcome.

However, it is not just the chef and host who need to be prepared. The guest too needs to recognise that the invitation to a dinner party is not to be taken lightly.

The dinner party is a Machiavellian kind of event.

You have to be on your toes, or you could lose your head (metaphorically speaking).

Guests should prepare for a dinner party in a number of ways. A few days before the event they should prepare and practice a number of anecdotes that they could recount should the situation arise - it will. Then they should consider the vexed question of what wine to bring. This is fraught with danger. Do not be guided by the ‘drive-thru’ attendant who has noticed that cask Lambrusco has been popular today . . . Something in a glass bottle is always recommended.

And then there is staying power. Will you be able to get through the seven intricately prepared courses, each with its own set of vaguely useless cutlery and still remain shirt-stain-free? Will you be able to add an interesting comment about the fourth bottle of wine? Tears and stammering should not result from an enquiry as to whether the savignon blanc you brought is more characteristic of New Zealand than the Adelaide Hills!

Finally there is the other fraught question. When is the correct time to leave? Should it be judged on time alone (We leave at 1am), mood (We leave when the bickering starts), dependent on others (Don’t go before the other guests) or on a reading of the signs (Tea leaves in cups or chef’s knives in attitudes reminiscent of ‘Psycho’)?

So, there you are. Just a few ideas and tips on dining at the Chateau. A breeze, nothing to worry about!

And here are pictures from one we prepared earlier . . .



Ready for anything - table set, flowers arranged, candles lit, glasses polished



Food ready for action. What can be pre-prepared is done and ready for assembly upon the completion of other cooking tasks



The guests playing their part - Peter, Shayne, Graham and Kenneth. The conversation relating to the various merits of anodised versus brushed aluminium had the table rapt in interest for seconds

Swim, Ride, Run . . . & Eat

Over the past three weeks I have cycled about 300km (half of them seriously uphill on the ride to work from home to Crafers, elevation 700 metres), run over 60km and swum about 25km. All of this activity has been to ensure a fitness level commensurate with the completion of a full Olympic triathlon, which comprises a 1.5km swim, a 40km bike ride and a 10km run.

To cut a long story short, I did enough training and I did it with more verve than I thought possible. And I did it in a shorter time than I thought I would – just under 3 hours (I think, I’m still awaiting the official results). (Results in. I completed the triathlon in 2 hours and 47 minutes. I came 147th over all out of 205 participants who completed the event and 18th in my category. As usual I did best in the swim, middling in the run and worst in the ride. There were 24 in my age category.)

The triathlon was at Victor Harbor and we stayed in a rental at Middleton (which is nearby) for three nights. ‘We’ were Graham and Kenneth, Terry and Kay and David and me. Graham, Terry and me all did triathlons on the Sunday and Terry and Kay also did the fun run. David and Kenneth were secconded as support crew.

The 1.5km swim was straight forward, apart from being smacked in the nose and hitting random arms and legs as I swam along. After the first 500 metres though, I had a puddle of water to myself.

Then off on the bike. We rode a course that took us out of Victor and into the nearby hills. The hills suited me. I caught up to people on the hills . . . but then they whizzed past me on the flat. It was really windy on the ride. There were huge gusts in one particularly unprotected place. It also rained while we were on the ride - just drizzle really but several people fell off due to the wet conditions. We did two laps of a 20km loop.

The run was in the area around the canal estate we swam in. Two 5km loops. I did the first at a moderate pace and then when I found that not too difficult I upped the pace and hooned the last 5km.

Graham attempted the Olympic triathlon. He did well in the swim (as expected) and came out of the water about 5 minutes or more before I did. He did the whole ride and one loop of the run before calling it quits. He did no training for the run! Nothing. So he did really well!

Terry completed the short course triathlon. The swim (as usual) posing the biggest challenge for him. He also did the 5km fun run with his wife Kay later in the day.

On Sunday night David cooked for us all. He used the barbecue at the house and chargrilled marinated prawns, chicken and lamb. Each was a separate course with its own small salad or accompaniment. Dessert was chargrilled peaches.

Kenneth did some cooking too. Tea on Saturday night was a sensational smoked salmon salad and on Monday morning we had scrambled eggs and more smoked salmon. Terry did a yummy traditional eggs and bacon breakfast on Saturday morning.

On the holiday Monday we had lunch at a newly renovated pub at Port Elliot with Graham. While we were there the steam train went past twice - the pub is right next to the tracks. Then we visited two wineries in the Yanaklilla area and drove along the coast to McLaren Vale. We had dinner at Awganix in McLaren Vale (the former Limeburners). Great food. Then home.

Below: Enlargification occurs if you clickificate the photos.



Terry tackles the short course triathlon.



Graham almost completes the Olympic distance triathlon. As he did no training other than swimming - to complete the swim, the ride and 5km of the 10km run - represents quite a feat.



In the swim someone hit me in the nose and I kept banging into random arms and legs for the first 500 metres. The water was cold but okay.



Here I am on the course riding and running. I was so happy with the run - I sped up as I went along. I did the second 5km much faster than the first 5km. Last photo, leg cooling.



Finishing the first 5km lap



Running to the finish.



The competition.



Terry and Kay on the 5km fun run.



The after-race team portrait - Harvey, Graham and Terry.



On the Monday we took the long way home. David posing at Carickalinga.



The beach at Carickalinga

Mega Swim 2007 or Tackling Everest with Kathy

From 1pm Saturday, March 3 until 1pm Sunday, March 4 an intrepid group of swimmers led by the indomitable and inspirational Ms Kathy Heenan (Butterfly Champion Eaxtraordinaire) tackled the north face of Everest. Sorry, wrong weekend. That was the weekend previous to this one. This weekend (March 3&4) was all about the Mega Swim, at Unley Pool, and it involved swimming. No, none of the swimmers actually used crampons, Yeti or Sherpa Tensing to swim their allocated distance (which was actually measured in time). That time being 15 minutes unless you were Lindsay or Alice where your distance was 15 minutes and your time, the length of a piece of string. But I digress.

Having spent weeks in training for the event, the Swim4Life posse was in peak physical condition and ready to take on any challenge and execute it with a plum. Sorry, that should be aplomb - I think. Second in charge Sergeant Major Norton-Graham also undertook responsibility for the group. Indeed, his suggestion of an Esther Williams inspired half-time water ballet was met with consternation, but recovering well, he decided that we should, during the sprints, swim 50 metres freestyle and the other 50 metres 'form' (any thing other than freestyle).

So that gallant band, swimming the allotted period of space-time continuum, swam until a full day had passed by. And upon conclusion of this length of string theory, it was discovered that the group had swum a totality of 62.2 kilometres. Which roughly translates to a distance from here to an outer galaxy and back - where here is x and the outer galaxy is undefinable. See figure '2a' below.

I hope this enlighten-i-fies you all on what took place between the days and times mentioned above and the manner in which all activites were processioned.

Now that you've glanced past this you can look at the pictures. (Reading is such a tawdry activity.) But remember if you click on the pictures they will emerge, enlargified, in another screen. Just click back on you browesr to return to normal programming.




The view at about 2.45am just before I hopped in the pool.



The place has a fabulous atmosphere in the middle of the night. It's all very at ease with itself.



And the lighting is quite different. Kenneth attacks what he thought would be his last few laps for the night.




Suddenly it's daytime. Kay, Terry and Kenneth.



Waiting for the sprints to start.



John and Lindsay discuss tactics.




This is most definitely a picture of . . . a person from our squad swimming. In our lane on March 4 . . . 2007. Definitely.



Chums. Jonathon and Peter converse.



Another of our swimmers . . . swimming. That's what we were doing . . . swimming. I'm sure you can see who it is.



Jonathon and Sharla await their turn.



Another strategy session gets under way.



Me diving in. Impressive - huh! Actually, my goggles came off and I had to hastily push them back on. I spent the 100 metres with half a fish tank in each lens.



Water, pool lane markers, black lines - the whole deal.



See comment immediately above. Just more so.



Diving. Not one of our group.



It's a dive Jim, but not as we know it. Again, not someone from our group.



Kenneth zooming through the water with the greatest of tease. Whoops, that of course swhould read 'ease'. Sorry 'bout that boss.



Terry performing breastroke.